Today marks the 1-year anniversary of our son Nate’s passing from a short but fierce battle with cancer. I can’t help but reflect on the events of last year and the days leading up to February 5th. Truthfully it has been the hardest test our family has ever had to endure. For me as a mother it has been a year of tears, testimony and trusting in the Lord.
There is a saying that goes;
“Your wings were ready but my heart was not.”
Having said that I am blessed by the knowledge we did everything we could to help sustain Nate’s life and, in the end, I know that it truly was his time to go. He had finished his work here on earth. That gives me much peace.
I also treasure all the time spent with Nate. As hard as that was to watch him suffer, I saw tremendous strength and such deep dependence on the Lord from both Nate & and his beautiful wife. They have set a firm foundation for their 4 children to build on – what a blessing, what a legacy!
In my scripture studying this week and researching I came across this thought that I felt beautifully described how I feel about last year…
Such sufferings and hardships are but a “moment in eternity”, yet while going through them, they are “an eternal moment”.
YES Nate’s path to heaven was a hard one to watch but along the way there were many Doses of Joy which sustained us. There were many lessons learned. I learned I can do hard things. I have more faith and trust in the Lord and more gratitude for a Savior. My prayers are more sincere and I am grateful for the gift of repentance, for each new day, for family. I have truly learned that time spent with family is never wasted.
I have learned that cancer did not take Nate away from us, it qualified him for Heaven and how we choose to go forward in this life without Nate is our qualifier. I have learned he is a part of our lives forever and our angel cheering us on.
So today for the first anniversary of Nate’s passing we choose to honor him by DOing GOOD and serving others. By looking for or creating Doses of JOY each day.
Today my greatest Dose of JOY was spending time with my family and knowing I will see Nate again and for that I am eternally grateful. Happy Heaven Day Son. Love MOM